- Markshire PCs:
. I was hanginâ€™ â€˜round outside the Temple in Foothold last night with Sunny, Tam and Raven just shootinâ€™ the breeze when a dwarf I ainâ€™t never seen before, saunters up to where we was standinâ€™.
The little man was well-mannered, acknowleging us with a proper bow and a warm smile. We said hello to him and introduced ourselves. He told us his name was Hermie, or somethinâ€™ like that. I ainâ€™t too good rememberinâ€™ names. He said he hadnâ€™t been to this part oâ€™ Markshire in quite awhile.
While we talked I noticed his military pick what he kept twiddlinâ€™at and I suspected at one time or another heâ€™d belonged to a militia or some kind oâ€™ army. He had the look oâ€™ someone whoâ€™d journeyed long and hard from someplace far away because his clothes was a bit ragged and his armor tarnished.
But he was polite, seeinâ€™ he was a man, and he reminded me oâ€™ Durok a little. Both he and Durok had the same sparkle in their eyes so, straight off, I decided I liked him! At least until heâ€™d be doinâ€™ somethinâ€™ awful what would make me change my mind, you know?
Anyways, he asked us where he might be findinâ€™ a blacksmith and we pointed out the entrance to the bazaar up on the hill what lay beyond. In there he could find just about anything he might be needinâ€™ includingâ€™ a master blacksmith. We also told him â€˜bout the Dragon Inn, where he could buy a decent meal for a fair price, â€˜cause he looked to us as though he could really use one!
So off he went, smilingâ€™ and bowingâ€™ to us one more time, which I thought was so nice!
With Henry gone the conversation started up again with Sunny askinâ€™ me about the . . . things she made for me awhile back, and had I tried each one oâ€™ them out yet? I told her Iâ€™d worn every one except for the pair she made out oâ€™ leather cause I ainâ€™t got no idea how to go about washinâ€™ leather . . .things! Tam laughed at that and suggested I use saddle soap.
Well, between you and me, I ainâ€™t even asked her to make me any leather . . . things, and I ainâ€™t got no idea why she done it. I guess sheâ€™d run out oâ€™ silk. Anyhow, straight off, Raven and Tam was wantinâ€™ to know what the . . . things was, and could they see the . . . things, and what colors did Sunny make, and was they comfortable and not binding, and where did Sunny sew on the monogram, and oh geez, they went on and on like that for what seemed like an hour!
Finally Tam and Raven decided before theyâ€™d go about placingâ€™ an order with Sunny for any . . . things for themselves, they wanted to see what I looked like wearinâ€™ them! Then Sunny chimed in, agreeingâ€™ with the both of them, tellinâ€™ me it would be a grand idea â€˜cause sheâ€™d have a good chance to show off her merchandise on a real live model!
Ohhh geez! I remember not too long ago, back home in the village I come from, havin pajama parties every so often with the rest oâ€™ my girlfriends! Yup! Weâ€™d be runninâ€™ all over the house, screaminâ€™ and laughinâ€™ carryinâ€™ on like a bunch oâ€™ maniacs and havinâ€™ a grand time whackinâ€™ at each other with huge down filled pillows, never thinkinâ€™ for one moment â€˜bout what we was wearinâ€™ . . . or what we wasnâ€™t!
But this was different, you know? Now donâ€™t get me wrong and I canâ€™t exactly put my finger on the why of it, but thereâ€™s somethinâ€™ about those three . . . and the thought oâ€™ paradinâ€™ around in front of them wearinâ€™ hardly nothinâ€™ at all . . . Well it was givinâ€™ me a nervous stomach!
They said they was even gonna build a ramp for me to traipse up and down, and Sonny knew a cobbler what could make me a pair oâ€™ shoes with pointy heels stuck on â€˜em so Iâ€™d look as though I was walkinâ€™ â€˜round on my tiptoes and that was that!
After all that gabbin’â€™ we was thirsty so the four of us made our way to the Dragon Inn, found a table and we sat there drinkin’for the rest oâ€™ the night. We seen Howie one more time. He came in late, loaded up with the new gear heâ€™d bought in the shops weâ€™d told him about, and before he left our table he sang us a lovely ballad!
It was late for me too, and I said my goodnights to everyone and walked out the door. Oh geez! Who do I meet on my way home but Loli Elgyr! You know that old lady monk with the wart on her nose and one short leg?
Well, anyways, we get to talkinâ€™ and I tell her all about the plans what Sunny, Raven and Tam is makinâ€™ to have me model my . . . things for â€˜em and how the thought oâ€™ doinâ€™ it is givinâ€™ me a nervous tummy!
Well, glory be! She tells me sheâ€™s always wanted to try her hand at modeling, and sheâ€™d be glad to do it for me! I gave her a big hug, and except for the ones I was wearinâ€™, I dug down into my pack and pulled out the rest oâ€™ my . . . things and handed them to her! She looked at them a moment, then looked at my waist, and the rest oâ€™ me, then looked down at herself and began to shake her head. I snatched a pair back from her and began to stretch ’em out till my arms were as wide apart as they would go. â€œDo you see Loli? Sunny wove Spandex into the silk!
Youâ€™re able stretch â€˜em out so far youâ€™d be able to cram a horse into them! Not that I think youâ€™re anywhere near the size oâ€™ a horse, mind you! And look!â€ I let one end go and they snapped back into shape with a twang. â€œYou see? One size fits all!â€
Her face lit up with a smile and my nervous tummy ainâ€™t bothered me no more, and I went home to bed, knowinâ€™ Iâ€™d be dreaminâ€™ about Loli, scootinâ€™ up and down that ramp, twirlin and twistinâ€™ and giving those three girls a show, the likes oâ€™ which theyâ€™d never seen before!