Time for a muddy story, yeah, it’s been awhile.

[muddy]

True story…

Last night on the way to breastfeeding class my wife asked me to fill the vehicle up with gas. Being a fairly decent guy I did so. I pull into the station and while I pump the gas there is a black gal thumping out some sweet gangsta rap. I shut my ears off and continue to pump gas. Shortly thereafter a couple black guys come out of the gas station and begin to do the high pitched fast talk in order to woo the gal. She has none of it, gives them an eye roll and pulls off. They slap hands a few times and chatter out some uncoherant rig-a-marole until they see me. FORTUNATELY I’m pumping gas next to their rusted out chit box. One guy elbows the other as they approach. I brace myself for the worst and quickly look around for surveillance cameras. The guy with the SWEET dread locks grins brightly and says “Hiya Honkey” and his taller buddy does that bent over obnoxious giggle while saying “Whaddup Whitey”?

They slap hands and do more bent over obnoxiuos giggling at my silent and staring self. They then hitched up their pants, for some reason they were too big for them, and then departed in their rusted out chit box of a Grand Am, leaving me in a state of shock. Then I saw the license plate… Illinois. After that I noticed some dealer tag thing… outskirts of southern Chicago.

I finished pumping the gas, straightened and straightened my pants out. You see, I had a belt on, thus no hitching up. Got into the car and continued on to breastfeeding class. I am by no means a racist but damn did I laugh when I thought about what my grandma would’ve said. 🙂

So please… call me Honkey. 😉

Why do things like this always happen to me?

[Monty]

Why do things like this always happen to me?

Because you weren’t in your camo’s holding a shotgun or a bow. If the two punks (color not even an issue, they were punks) had seen the backwoods Muddy, they would’ve went waaay out of their way to avoid you, and without the smart remarks, either. *Sighs* Politeness and courtesy are dead, at least in South Chicago.

🙂

M3C

[BeyondThePale]

@muddy wrote:

Why do things like this always happen to me?

You have an air about you. It takes a while to work past.

Oh, and you needed a class on that?

[Opinvu]

I was going to say, it was because they knew you were going to a breast dfeeding class…. All black men are born Pro’s at breast feeding, they were just slightly embaressed they failied at their attempt to breast feed as they left the stations lobby. Their ego had deflaited slightly fromt he woman’s dismissive behaiviour and had to refill it up.

Happens all the time here honkey.

[muddy]

@BeyondThePale wrote:

Oh, and you needed a class on that?

With twins on the way we had some questions/concerns on how B was going to get her double latch on. The “football carry” is the accepted twin feeding method, it will be interesting for sure.

[s-m-r]

“Hey! Don’t carry that baby like a loaf of bread!!!”

[mule]

Oh man muddy, no one black or white ever comes up to me and says such things.. you do have all the fun. Of course I dunno how I would have reacted… prolly by laughing at them, which would have started a whole nother bruhaha

– mule

[Author]

Posts